Unspoken Expectations are Premeditated Resentments

Unspoken Expectations are Premeditated Resentments

No matter the context – relationships, personal development programs, or businesses – we all feel there are certain things that are supposed to happen in certain situations. And we’re disappointed when they don’t.

But no one knows what’s going on with another, especially when there is no communication.

Some of us are busy feeling underappreciated. Some of us are waiting for the breakthrough we’re supposed to be having, getting frustrated that it’s not showing up. Some of us are feeling like we’re missing the training we require to be effective in the role we were given.

Western culture owes a great deal to assumption. We assume people know. We assume people are competent. We assume people have the same capacity or ability or skills we have.

“They’ll do fine,” we say.

And we’re surprised to find our significant others, peers, collaborators, or partners consistently missing the target when we haven’t even generated the dartboard.

“XYZ should be setting aside time to individually call everyone on the team.”

“ABC should know why I’m offended and why they should apologize to me profusely if they ever hope to be spoken to again.”

And often people don’t know. Aren’t skilled. Aren’t thinking about others. Can’t see past their own frenzied world of to-dos, assignments, calls, meetings, relationships, and circumstances.

This is not about finger pointing. It’s about recognizing that communication isn’t happening where it’s supposed to be happening.

Those who are disempowered or are wondering why things are being done a certain way when they could be done another way need to speak up.

Those who are assuming knowledge, or knowhow, or specific actions need to speak up, ask whether everyone knows what they’re doing, and if not, provide opportunities for training.

No matter what it is, you need to speak up.

Never hold onto expectations. Either share them or surrender them entirely. Otherwise, you’re premeditating resentment. You’re thinking about all the ways you’ll be mad when someone doesn’t pass a test, they were never given the study material for.

Never hold onto expectations. Either share them or surrender them entirely. Otherwise, you’re premeditating resentment. Click To Tweet
Please Share This

Please Share This

It’s Saturday, and normally, this is when I would be sharing a weekly digest.

Not this week.

Because this week, I’m taking a stand for something.

I’m taking a stand that my post on blogging daily for a year gets shared with the media, bloggers, podcasters, and anyone else you think might benefit from covering this story.

I want to see this story on 10 publications, 10 blogs, and 10 podcasts.

Let me be clear – I’m requesting that you share this inspiring and valuable post. Now. Because the above is only possible with your help.

And before you ask, yes, I will also be sharing it.

The post is live on my blog and on Medium. You can share either one.

Here are the links:

I Published Daily for a Full Year: Here are the Results
I Published Daily for a Full Year: Here are the Results (Medium)

Thanks for your help. Let’s get this out there!

What Are You Afraid to Admit?

What Are You Afraid to Admit?

Chances are this is where you’re due for a breakthrough.

And it’s going to take something to identify whatever is there for you.

And then it’s going to take something to share it with someone. But sharing is essential, because if you don’t admit your inauthenticity to someone else, you’re bound to stay marinating in it.

But when you finally do share your inauthenticity, a great sense of relief and freedom will come over you, and it will be worth it. You’ll wonder why you didn’t do it sooner.

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