I was at a birthday party yesterday, enjoying myself and the company. I partook in the delicious food and tea.
But suddenly, I stood up. Anxiety hit me like a tidal wave. This was my body letting me know that it had had enough.
I had to step outside of the restaurant, and walk around in the streets, using every technique I knew to calm myself from the sudden terror that had gripped me.
Fueled by caffeine and a singular desire to make a difference for those around me, I’ve been pushing myself too hard for too long these past four to five months.
I took a bit of a break in April, but since then, I’ve launched multiple products, and even went through some intensive coursework and training.
Too much caffeine. Too many long workdays. Too many projects and ideas.
The anxiety was terrible, but this is the good news – this was an early warning sign.
Assuming I reduce my workdays, get more rest and sleep, focus on my health, and take a two week break in October as I had planned to do, everything should be fine.
This is not the first time this has happened, which makes recovery a little easier. Again, it helps that I’ve caught it early.
But from now on, I don’t think I will be pushing myself as hard as I have been as of late. Whether it’s hiring, extending deadlines, focusing on one thing at a time or otherwise, I will need to come up with a new approach. Because I don’t want to experience what I experienced yesterday ever again. It’s enough.