If you’re trying to find success away from your identity, stop.
So many of us are trying to do things we were never set up to do in the first place, because we think it’s what people want. We think it’s where we’re going to find success.
But what it amounts to is forcing a square peg in a round hole.
You can’t play peek a boo with yourself and expect to be rewarded for it. Breakthrough only happens where self-expression and activity are fully aligned. Your identity holds the keys to your breakthrough.
If you’re an aspiring guitarist who doesn’t like social media, then social media is not the path to the outcomes you desire.
Look at what you’re already doing. What do you enjoy? Where do you like to spend your time?
If you like video games, guess what? There’s a niche for video game style music. You could market yourself as a video game guitarist and play Comic-Cons all over the world. You wouldn’t need to build a fan base because the fan base is already there. Strategy? Your only strategy would be to love the living hell out of what you do and to be a good hang.
Where self-expression and activity aren’t fully aligned, there’s always forcing, and in a game of chicken, the Universe always wins.
How will you know when self-expression and identity are fully aligned? When you’re excited and scared at the same time. Anything less is not an endeavor worthy of your attention. Anything less is at a lower vibration compared to the person you’ve expanded to become. You’ve got to go a step beyond. If it isn’t expansion, it’s a cop-out, an imposter masquerading as opportunity, a counterfeit.
Don’t try to cater to the masses. Instead, go inside and discover what’s there. Notice what you love doing and match up your activity with that.
Most entrepreneurs find self-aggrandizing awkward and uncomfortable.
In one way or another, consciously or unconsciously, we’ve all been conditioned to hold back. To avoid appearing cocky or arrogant. To save face. To sidestep drawing attention to ourselves.
But if you don’t act as though you’re important, who’s going to do it on your behalf?
More certificates, diplomas, degrees, and doctorates won’t make you any more important. No awards or commendations will make you more important. Even being “discovered” won’t make you any more important than you already are, and it probably won’t happen, especially if you act as though you are unimportant.
You can’t wait for permission because no one is going to give it to you. There is simply too much going on in the world. Everyone is building towards their dreams. If you can’t find a way to integrate your goals with the goals of others, you should not expect to receive much help or recognition. If you don’t know what’s important to the people you’re working with, do not expect them to stick around. At some point, they will leave, and they won’t come back.
Hiding behind a corporate logo is a sure way to lose. People don’t connect with brands; they connect with the people behind the brands.
Place your photo everywhere, on your business cards, in your email signature, in the sidebar of your website. It doesn’t matter whether you like being photographed or how you appear in a photograph. Showing your face is a crucial and necessary step to self-aggrandizing.
Whether you’re an award-winning entrepreneur, a best-selling author, certified life coach, or anything else of note, hammer it repeatedly in your media. And if you haven’t accomplished anything of note, either set out to achieve something in the next year or study the process of manufacturing influence.
Have others talk you up. Get someone to introduce you on your webinars or at your live presentations. Have one of your top clients create a video sales letter for you and get them to share the amazing results they got and why others should hire you or buy your product immediately.
You’re important because you say you’re important. Self-aggrandizing is the first step to being perceived as important and influential by others.
You can live life on your own terms. It doesn’t matter at all what’s going on around you.
Your day may be booked with back-to-back meetings.
You may have 5,000 words of copy to submit to your client by end of day.
You may need to wake up at 5:30 AM, get your kids ready for school, head off to a job you don’t like, pick up your kids from school, and work on your business at night.
It makes no difference whatsoever.
It’s up to you how you show up. It’s up to you what you show up to. Your participation is yours to cause.
Of course, do what you’ve committed to. Keep your word. Follow through.
If you don’t intend to, get into conversation with the people who will be affected. Acknowledge why you’re not coming. Take a moment to understand the impact it will have on the stakeholders and take full responsibility for it. Do right by them.
Not doing this will erode your confidence. You’ll begin to second guess yourself. And that’s a negative spiral you can’t allow into your life. You want to be the first person who speaks up when it seems like the least comfortable.
But even the impossible will seem possible when you’re present and in the moment.
Even when you’re double booked, you’ll find a way to make it work.
Even if you’re driving while the meeting is happening (not recommended), there’s a way to participate in the conversation that’s unfolding.
You think you can only do one thing at a time, in an orderly, sequential fashion. And it’s categorically not how successful people operate. They’re out making a mess while you’re trying to get all your ducks in a row.
You assume that juggling a full schedule would be stressful. But it’s the opposite – it’s exhilarating!
You believe that it takes a long time to coach someone or to help them understand where you’re coming from. It doesn’t. If you’re straight, direct, and authentic, the conversation doesn’t have to last for hours. You can lead someone to a meaningful solution. You can create a connection. Transformation is now.
Nothing takes time. Time is an illusion. Overwhelm is an illusion. Everything is in the moment.
Transformation occurs in the moment.
There is no waiting for transformation.
There is no working towards transformation.
Small progress is not snowballing and gaining momentum towards big progress.
Incremental change isn’t leading up to a breakthrough.
Transformation is now. And if it isn’t, it’s not transformation. You should be skeptical of anything that isn’t happening now because tomorrow is but a concept.
Today is all you have, and tomorrow will just be another today. It will only be another now when you get there. The time “in between,” so far as we’re concerned, doesn’t exist.
Here and now is where transformation happens. Here and now is where transformation is needed. You don’t need it tomorrow. You need it today, and it’s available today.
You either say what needs to be said, or you don’t.
You either give up alcohol, or you don’t.
You either begin doing what it takes to lose weight, or you don’t.
There is no middle ground.
The change you’ve been waiting for will not suddenly tackle you to the ground and announce itself.
Why? Because you’re responsible for that change. You already have everything you need to make that change. The power has always been within you.
Don’t hide. Don’t play small.
You’re here for a reason, and your vision matters. You can make a difference as much as anyone else can. No one is any better than you. And, importantly, you can start now.
Who cares about what you did or didn’t do? You did what you did, and you didn’t do what you didn’t do. That has nothing to do with what’s occurring in this moment.
Don’t talk about creating the life you want. Create the life you want. It’s available now.
Don’t look for transformation, don’t talk about transformation, don’t work towards transformation.